One of the many recent disturbing trends of this decade has been the emergence of the bluetooth headset. In a technology obsessed world, it seems like everyone is trying to get on board with the latest gadget trends. And while I’m as tech obsessed as the next guy, you will NEVER see me wearing these one-ear bluetooth headset monstrosities. For one they remind me way too much of profoundly nerdy days in my past. However more importantly they’ve turned into a near cultural status symbol. It’s a device that allows its users to finally tell the world what they’ve been dying to for years: “Hey look at me! I have money and am expecting many important phone calls from many important people! I mean just look at this expensive thing in my ear!” Statements which reek of the mentality synonymous with the douche.

I guess I should qualify my thoughts a bit. I’m all right with the usage of these things in a car, while taking phone calls around the office, etc. My complaint is against people who wear them around everywhere. Just take them out in situations that might warrant their use and then put them away! Are you that desperate for attention that you have to have your headset jammed in your skull while at dinner or wandering around the mall? Is it that hard to reach into your pocket and take out your phone?

However while my main complaint here is against Bluetooth headsets, there are still some throwback douches out there like the one featured below that have earned my ire. You know who I’m talking about, the geniuses out there who rock their wired “hands-free” headsets while holding the microphone close to their face. A questionable move that both requires a strikingly similar movement to holding a phone normally and negates the whole “hands-free” element. Nothing like a fundamental misunderstanding of the purpose of gadgetry.